Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jan 22, 2020 21:17:30 GMT -5
Am I always going to be a doormat? Am I always going to be a people pleaser? Am I always going to live my life how everyone else wants me to live it? It's freaking scary. I'm going to die unhappy because I spent way too much time making everyone else happy and forgot about myself. When I die, am I even going to be missed for the right reasons? Or is it going to be purely because I was an easy target and always available? It already scares me to think about no one missing me when I'm gone but now this? I haven't done much to work on saying no more and standing up for myself in general, fine, I'll admit it. But I am just...so close to giving up. Life really isn't worth living if I'm not living the life I want to have. And I don't even know what that is! I feel like I have to keep my life plans open for everyone else. I always have to be available. I always have to be ready to go here or there or do this or that. But what about what I want to do? But, again, I don't know what I want to do because I don't have kidding time to think about it! God if people could just leave me alone! I don't want to have to become cold and shut myself off from everyone. I don't want to have to get rid of the one good thing I see about myself. But I'm getting kidding close.
|
|
Roman
Next Level Swiftie
50%
Posts: 5,833
|
Post by Roman on Jan 23, 2020 8:30:52 GMT -5
Am I always going to be a doormat? Am I always going to be a people pleaser? Am I always going to live my life how everyone else wants me to live it? It's freaking scary. I'm going to die unhappy because I spent way too much time making everyone else happy and forgot about myself. When I die, am I even going to be missed for the right reasons? Or is it going to be purely because I was an easy target and always available? It already scares me to think about no one missing me when I'm gone but now this? I haven't done much to work on saying no more and standing up for myself in general, fine, I'll admit it. But I am just...so close to giving up. Life really isn't worth living if I'm not living the life I want to have. And I don't even know what that is! I feel like I have to keep my life plans open for everyone else. I always have to be available. I always have to be ready to go here or there or do this or that. But what about what I want to do? But, again, I don't know what I want to do because I don't have kidding time to think about it! God if people could just leave me alone! I don't want to have to become cold and shut myself off from everyone. I don't want to have to get rid of the one good thing I see about myself. But I'm getting kidding close. The first step to recovery is admitting there's a problem Joking aside. I understand what you're going through. You identified the problems. It's scary to let go of your entire world as you know it now. But it's an important step to grow up and improve your life the way YOU want it. You might want to start with working on your depression and negative image of yourself. Once you get stronger, you can be more assertive and communicate with people around you. I know it seems nearly impossible, but you can do it. Take really small steps at a time. You are important to this world, don't give up!
|
|
|
Post by MyCastleCrumbledOvernight on Mar 14, 2020 17:59:12 GMT -5
I’ve watched the ME! music video a lot looking for Easter eggs or whatever I’ve watched You Need To Calm Down maybe twice Lover once or twice The Man exactly one time.
|
|
|
Post by TaylorSwiftFan on Mar 14, 2020 21:24:53 GMT -5
I’ve watched the ME! music video a lot looking for Easter eggs or whatever I’ve watched You Need To Calm Down maybe twice Lover once or twice The Man exactly one time. But I've actually only watched 'The Man' once through the entire way too...
|
|
|
Post by FearlesslySpeakNow on Mar 15, 2020 4:45:54 GMT -5
I've killed someone before just kidding, I've just wanted someone to post something shocking like this in this thread for so long but it's never happened so alkdjf
|
|
sharonlovestaylor
Next Level Swiftie
Shake it Off
Posts: 6,755
Mini-Profile Background: {"image":"","color":""}
Mini-Profile Text Color: Black
|
Post by sharonlovestaylor on Mar 26, 2020 10:33:12 GMT -5
I don't think I am getting the hang of this motherhood thing. She cries and cries and sometimes I get so frustrated that I wish I could take her back to the hospital. I am an awful person just thinking this I know.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 26, 2020 11:01:11 GMT -5
I don't think I am getting the hang of this motherhood thing. She cries and cries and sometimes I get so frustrated that I wish I could take her back to the hospital. I am an awful person just thinking this I know. Everything will be okay. You will get used to this as time goes by and you will be a great Mom.
|
|
Roman
Next Level Swiftie
50%
Posts: 5,833
|
Post by Roman on Mar 26, 2020 12:08:12 GMT -5
I don't think I am getting the hang of this motherhood thing. She cries and cries and sometimes I get so frustrated that I wish I could take her back to the hospital. I am an awful person just thinking this I know. Don’t blame yourself. Every mother will have feelings like that. There’s not much you can do. Babies can be like that. Doesn’t mean you’re not doing a great job. Unfortunately you can’t do much else than take care of her and power through eventhough you’re exhausted. One day your child will be grateful! (little heads up: probably not during their teenage years )
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Apr 12, 2020 16:34:31 GMT -5
Realized last night that I’m using the virus as an excuse to not get help...told myself all of the offices would be closed and didn’t even bother with seeing if they were or not. BUT, I took a step last night and found a place in my city that’s offering phone and video sessions at the moment. It’s going to be a little uncomfortable since there’s nowhere I can go in my house for complete privacy. I know I need to do it regardless. I’m going to try to ask my mom tomorrow about setting up an appointment.
|
|
Roman
Next Level Swiftie
50%
Posts: 5,833
|
Post by Roman on Apr 13, 2020 1:38:41 GMT -5
Realized last night that I’m using the virus as an excuse to not get help...told myself all of the offices would be closed and didn’t even bother with seeing if they were or not. BUT, I took a step last night and found a place in my city that’s offering phone and video sessions at the moment. It’s going to be a little uncomfortable since there’s nowhere I can go in my house for complete privacy. I know I need to do it regardless. I’m going to try to ask my mom tomorrow about setting up an appointment. That is great in many ways. Proud of you!
|
|
Roman
Next Level Swiftie
50%
Posts: 5,833
|
Post by Roman on Apr 14, 2020 14:32:06 GMT -5
I don’t like phones. Whenever the phone rings I get anxious. I always get that feeling “What now?” “Who’s that?” “Leave me alone”.
|
|
|
Post by taryn on Apr 17, 2020 21:34:40 GMT -5
I'm terrible with this, but I still listen to music despite the fact if they have beef with Taylor. I know that's probably bad to say in a swiftie community, but I'm not gonna let beef stop me from listening to music or watching a fashion show or watching a movie. For instance, I still watched the Victoria Secret Fashion Show, even after the rumors that Karlie Kloss and Taylor weren't getting along. I still listened to the new Sam Smith and Demi Lovato song, despite both of them having beef with Taylor because of Sc**ter.
With the acceptation of K*nye W*est and K*m K*rd*shi*n, I respect a lot of people because I don't know the whole story, and I doubt I ever will, and I will never take away from them that they are making good music/art.
|
|
|
Post by MyCastleCrumbledOvernight on Apr 17, 2020 22:21:07 GMT -5
I’ve kind of been having a lot of kind of suicidal thoughts lately and I’m not sure if it’s like a new thing because I’m stressed or if I always kind of have? Like I guess I’ve always thought about it but haven’t considered it an option for a long time because I decided I just couldn’t do it to my family, but I’ve always kind of had these thoughts and just brushed them off but they seem to be increasing in volume lately and I’ve sort of started to acknowledge them and I don’t know if it’s better to do that and try to understand why I’m feeling this way or just ignore it as usual... I think when I try to bury thoughts I start to have more thoughts and it all just starts running together and that’s probably why I’m where I’m at now because I’m always trying to ignore my thoughts and things are getting really loud XD
|
|
shandimusic94
Next Level Swiftie
I'm a Chantel fan
Posts: 7,104
Mini-Profile Background: {"image":"https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/71CPHjGwpTL.jpg","color":""}
Mini-Profile Name Color: E6E6FA
Mini-Profile Text Color: e6e6fa
|
Post by shandimusic94 on Apr 17, 2020 22:54:13 GMT -5
I'm terrible with this, but I still listen to music despite the fact if they have beef with Taylor. I know that's probably bad to say in a swiftie community, but I'm not gonna let beef stop me from listening to music or watching a fashion show or watching a movie. For instance, I still watched the Victoria Secret Fashion Show, even after the rumors that Karlie Kloss and Taylor weren't getting along. I still listened to the new Sam Smith and Demi Lovato song, despite both of them having beef with Taylor because of Sc**ter. With the acceptation of K*nye W*est and K*m K*rd*shi*n, I respect a lot of people because I don't know the whole story, and I doubt I ever will, and I will never take away from them that they are making good music/art. I agree. I love Demi Lovato. I really don't care about the drama, this isn't high school.
|
|
|
Post by TaylorSwiftFan on Apr 17, 2020 22:54:36 GMT -5
I'm terrible with this, but I still listen to music despite the fact if they have beef with Taylor. I know that's probably bad to say in a swiftie community, but I'm not gonna let beef stop me from listening to music or watching a fashion show or watching a movie. For instance, I still watched the Victoria Secret Fashion Show, even after the rumors that Karlie Kloss and Taylor weren't getting along. I still listened to the new Sam Smith and Demi Lovato song, despite both of them having beef with Taylor because of Sc**ter. With the acceptation of K*nye W*est and K*m K*rd*shi*n, I respect a lot of people because I don't know the whole story, and I doubt I ever will, and I will never take away from them that they are making good music/art. You're probably a better person than me, because I couldn't do that lol. I guess it's because of loyalty too (to Taylor). On another note, I wonder why Demi is such a b*tch? She's been so rude to Taylor in the recent past for no reason and Taylor has only ever been nice to her. I can't get past that so I don't listen to her music. I used to like her but I don't really anymore. It's too bad because I sort of started to like Karlie just as a feud between them was suggested.
|
|